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It is common that people feel angry about something in daily living. Some of them repress anger, and others let it out. I think it is much better to control anger than to explode because anger would make the situation worse. So what is the best way for people to control anger? I found two generalizations in the "Manners, Emotions, and the American Way" are true in my own experience.
In the "Manners, Emotions, and the American Way", Carol Tavris states "Good manners melt resentment because they maintain respect between the two disagreeing parties." I agree with this generalization. It means you would be respected by people who you respect; even if you have disagreements or conflicts. For example, in some Olympic Games like swordplay, boxing and football, players will salute to each other before they start competition. It is called first friendship, second competition. Moreover, in my experience, my little sister frequently made mistakes in my room when she visited me. Sometime she deleted my document in my computer, sometime broke cups or disarranged all the books. It usually took my several hours to clean my room. However, I haven't been angry with her. She would say sorry and try to make up before I say anything. As a result, my anger disappears at that moment.
In another generalization, Carol Tavris suggests that "A culture's rules of anger are not arbitrary; they evolve along with its history and structure." It is right. The way that people deal with anger is dependent on their culture. For example, in my memory, my parents started to teach me to respect people and control emotions when I was a kid and could understand things. In addition, I was taught to have a kind heart for everyone. Moreover, it meant to treat people kindly and friendly. That was why china was called one of most mannered countries for centuries.
In conclusion, as people have different way to deal with anger, the best way is to solve by good manner. People should control anger instead of anger control themselves.
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